Sermon 12-21-25
Sermon 12-21-25 Matthew 1: 18-25 4 Advent
In 1983 there was a song recorded by the Nitty Gritty Dirt band called “Dance Little Jean”. The chorus goes: “Dance little Jean, this day is for you. Two people you love stood up to say I do. Dance little Jean, a prayer that you had, was answered today, your mama's marrying your dad”.
One of the quickest things to make my heart swell and bring tears to my eyes is to see a man stand up, in front of witnesses, and make a vow, to death us do part. Especially if the girl standing beside him already has a young child. That takes a kind of man sent from heaven.
In our Gospel reading today Matthew tells us the story of just such a man, Joseph.
The birth of Jesus is only mentioned in two of the gospels, Matthew and Luke. Luke's version is from the point of view of Mary, Matthew's is from Joseph.
The normal Jewish marriage procedure during that time consisted of three steps. The first step was engagement, which was an arrangement made through the parents of the prospective couple. Marriages in the Mediterranean world were arranged to join families not individuals.
A bride did not expect love, companionship or comfort. Both partners realized their union was for the mutual benefit of their two extended families. Fathers would look for a marriage partner for their children that would help the entire family, politically, economically or both.
The mothers would negotiate the finale details concerning a dowry. In the western world a dowry is money or property brought by a bride to her husband. In the Jewish world the father of the groom or the groom gives the dowry to the father of the bride. The dowry could be money, property, services or anything of value.
The second step was the betrothal. Our reading today uses the term “engaged” but, it should probably be “betrothed”, the second step.
Betrothal was the formal ratification of the agreement between the families. It was absolutely binding. The betrothal lasted at least a year and usually went into effect when the prospective bride became of marring age, about 13 or 14. The third step is the marriage proper which might last for a week or ten days.
The engagement step might have started when the couple were small children. Keep in mind, marriage was a process, not just an event.
During the betrothal the groom was to prepare living quarters for his bride, usually in his fathers house or family compound. The couple were known as man and wife and it was not uncommon for them to not associate or even see each other for that year. Kind of like military families.
To end a betrothal required a death of the partner or a legal divorce. The term “virgin widow” was not all that uncommon either.
It is at this stage of the game that Matthew lets us in.
Joseph and Mary are in the betrothal stage. They do not and have not lived together but, Mary is found to be with child.
There are rules about this sort of thing and they do not bode well for Mary.
The majority of towns around the Mediterranean area were small villages. Everyone knew everyone else's business, and they liked it that way. The women of town would have noticed that Mary was not participating in the obligatory monthly ritual of purification.
They know that Mary is in a family way. Joseph could have very well been the last person in town to know. But, Matthew tells us Joseph is a righteous man.
He is unwilling to expose her to public disgrace. According to the law, Joseph is entitled to return her to her father, she could have been stoned to death. But, he planned to divorce her quietly. You have to love this guy.
The people of the Mediterranean world live by an honor code. I've talked about this before. Draw an oblong circle around the Mediterranean Sea. The people who live in that area may not speak the same language but, they live and think very much alike. That honor code demands that no one take property that belongs to someone else. Thou shalt not steal.
Mary's baby does not belong to Joseph.
Joseph is an honorable man. He probably hopes the rightful father will take the opportunity to claim the child and marry Mary. He also knows he will not be able to display what are called the “tokens of virginity” on his wedding night, which are displayed for the benefit of the bride more than anyone else.
Col. Bill Smith spent several years in Iran as a government attache. He said it was still a common practice to hang wedding night bed sheets out the windows there.
It's called Joseph's predicament or Joseph's dilemma. He only thought he knew what to do. Then God steps in. Joseph is visited by an angel of the Lord the first of three times, in a dream.
Saint Joseph does not get a lot of print in the New Testament. About the only personal information we have of him is Matthew's genealogy, the village where he lived and his trade. There are also thousands of icons with his picture. They all, without exception, show his image as much older than Mary. In that time and place less than 5% of the population lived to the age of 30.
In the Old Testament Book of Joel and again in the Book of Acts we are told that young men will see visions and old men will dream dreams. That is probably where the older Joseph idea comes from.
The angel tells him, “Do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit”.
Notice in our reading that “Holy Spirit” is capitalized? The Jewish definition of God's holy spirit is a synonym for an aspect of God's power. It's not a personification of His very essence. We say the Holy Trinity, three in one. In Judaism, God's spirit was called “the holy spirit” without capitals. It was the power that gave prophets insight and inspired writers of sacred books.
Saint Joseph is considered to be the educator/guardian of the Lord. We believe Jesus was conceived by the Holy Spirit. I think Joseph might very well have been the Holy Spirit's prize pupil. Jesus' prayers were answered the day His mother married His dad. Amen.
